


Roll For Perception

by Guggi



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018) Actor RPF, Queen (Band)
Genre: Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition, M/M, Role-Playing Game
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-02-27
Packaged: 2019-11-03 20:40:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17884859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Guggi/pseuds/Guggi
Summary: The BoRhap boys and girl playing DnD as Queen members.“You can’t all be Bards!” The DM rubbed their brows.





	1. Chapter 1

“You can’t  _ all _ be Bards!” The DM rubbed their brows. 

“Sure, we can!” Joe spoke up. “Nothing else would really fit, would it?” He shuffled with his papers and notes, all in a big, disarranged pile. 

“I suppose you’re right, but then how about having an extra class? It’ll get too monotonous otherwise.”

The five guys and one woman nodded their heads. 

“I never wanted to be a Bard”, Lucy said. “I’ll be a--”

“Monk!” 

She shook her head and punched Ben on the shoulder. “No way, not a Monk! A Beguiler, perhaps. And Lawful evil.” She now sported a small, devilish grin. “Allows me to have some fun. But still being classy about it.”

“Good choice”, the DM agreed and scribbled something down. 

“I’ll be a Siren as well as a Bard”, Rami said with a dreamy look. “Lure people into my well thought out traps and enchant them.” He gave Aaron a big grin. “Chaotic neutral.”

Gwilym didn’t need to think twice either. “Lawful good and Animal Master, please.” He looked at his character’s high animal handling skills. “It’s a no-brainer, really.” 

Aaron studied the choices. “I’ll be a Barber!”

The DM cleared their throat. “That’s  _ Barbarian _ .”

“Oh, excuse me. Then I’ll choose Leaftender. I have zero intention of being a bard either. Lawful neutral.”

Ben heard Rami whispering something under his breath, that sounded too much like ‘ _ tend my leaves, please _ .’

“Tunnelrat?” Joe said. 

The DM reached for their pen. “No, no!” Joe held up both hands. “I don’t wanna be one. Maybe I’ll be, um, Divine Bard?” 

Ben snorted. “How about Savage Bard?” Joe appeared to be seriously considering the idea. 

“If you would permit me, Joe? I have an idea.” Joe looked at Gwilym. “Lurk?” 

Before Joe could object, the DM raised a finger. “You might need something as dull as a Cleric or Healer in your group?” 

Joe jumped onboard. “Cleric! True neutral.”

All eyes turned to Ben at last. “Oh, I already decided. Neutral evil. No doubt. And Druid.” 

“Druid?”

“Yes! You know, biology and all that.” 

“Speaking of”, Gwilym interrupted. “I want an Animal Companion. Or Familiar.”   
“Don’t you need to be a higher level for that? We’re all starting at level one”, Lucy asked. 

“We can bend the rules a little, can’t we? It’ll be a badger. Sweet little thing.”

Rami scrunched his nose. “Why a badger?”

Gwilym shrugged. “There’s just something about them. And they could be useful in a battle situation.”

“I’ll allow it”, the DM said. “And I forgot to ask; is everyone human?” They continued. Five nods. 

“No, I’m an elf.” Gwilym spoke. 

“You’re an elf? A curly haired elf?” 

Gwilym bit his lip and pondered for a while. “Alright, a half-elf.”

The DM wrote some more down. “All right, guys. I think we’re just about ready to get this quest started!” 


	2. Chapter 2

Ben reached out for his dice. “I swear I can take him down myself!”

Gwilym shook his head, but Ben continued. “I’ll use an improvised weapon.” He pretended to look around. “Coffee machine!”

Lucy looked through the Player’s Handbook. “It’s just a Gelatinous Cube. They can’t reach an Armor Class higher than six.” 

Aaron studied his inventory. “Maybe I have a sharp weapon somewhere between the rakes and garden scissors”, he mumbled to himself. 

“How do you even kill one of those? Doesn’t a spear or something just kinda… go through ‘em?” Joe asked. 

They all fell silent for a while. “Who would’ve thought that giant ooze ball could give us so much trouble? We’ve been trying to get past it for ten minutes now.” Rami sounded defeated. 

The DM had been trying to stay quiet and neutral during their encounter, but spoke up to help them along. They couldn’t play an entire campaign just as level 1, because they debated too long whenever something unpredictable occurred. “A weapon wouldn’t give enough damage”, they spoke just loud enough for Gwilym to hear, sitting right next to him. They were all new to the game and the DM didn’t want to waste any more time with a hecking Gelatinous Cube!

Gwilym looked up from his player sheet. “Maybe the improvised weapon wasn’t a bad idea?”

“Roll a Perception Check”, the DM said. 

Gwilym eyed Ben. Ben understood. “Alright, which one of us has the highest wisdom?” 

“We’re both Bards.”

“But as a Druid second I have the highest wisdom.” Ben gave Gwilym a cheeky grin and let his dice roll over the table towards Rami. “Seventeen!” Rami shouted. 

The DM waited a few seconds, having hoped Gwilym had been the one to roll, but since it wasn’t his turn, they had to make Ben understand what Gwilym should have. The DM drew a few circles. Six in all. Then a smaller circle, with black and white stripes. They marked the big circle next to the small one. “This is you.” Ben nodded. 

“Look to your right.”

Gwilym opened his mouth in glee, but remained silent. Not so long after, Lucy, Rami, Aaron and Joe all had a crooked smile. Ben squinted his eyes. “A raccoon?”

Gwilym reached for the dice. “Wisdom failed. My turn.” He shook his hand with the dice still inside his palm. Ben cocked his head and decided to just see where this was going. 

“As an Animal Handler I decide to now, well, handle my animal.” He gently let it roll across the table where it landed on Aaron’s papers. “Nineteen? I must have a new set of dice, that’s the highest I’ve ever gotten!”

“What’s your action?”

Gwilym answered without hesitation. “I let my badger at it.”

“Not surprisingly, it goes quite well. But you’re all quite astounded when Brian’s badger’s first action is to just take a bite out of the Cube. And then another. And another. Until it’s just guzzled it all up.”

Lucy made a disgusted face. “At least it worked”, Joe said. 

“In one throw.” 

“It didn’t have that many HPs. Moving on?”

They talked amongst themselves until Aaron answered. “”Yes, please, we need to stock up on some inventory. Two pairs of scissors and ten feet of rope isn’t going to get me anywhere, unless the next encounter is with a murderous daffodil or cursed sunflower.” 

“I need more rations”, one said. Others agreed. “Where’s the nearest town?” 

The DM checked the map and showed them their location. “No towns, but there’s a larger village about ten miles from where you are now. It will take you a day to get there on foot.” 

“Do we have enough money for a horse and cart?”, Joe asked the party. 

“Maybe if we all scrape together. We don’t need the fanciest one.” 

“You get there at night, just after dinner has been served in the tavern. Do you go to the tavern for accomodations?”

“Yes, Mary is sick and tired of sleeping in a tent!” Lucy exclaimed. 

“We’ll go shopping tomorrow then.” 

The party sat down in the tavern at a big table. “Freddie and I will go order some rooms”, Joe said confidently. 

The DM lowered their voice and spoke as the tavern keeper. “What can I do for you two gentlemen?” 

“Some free rooms and beds. Plus breakfast in the morning?”

“That should be possible. How many rooms?”

“Six.”

The DM raised their hands in apology. “Oh, I do fret, young gentlemen, but we haven’t that many available rooms.” 

“I don’t mind sharing”, Rami quickly said and smiled at the thought. 

“I only have four rooms. Two of them single bed.”

Joe looked at Rami. “Mary can have a room to herself then.” 

The tavern keeper held out his hand. “Two silver coins. I’ll write you two up together and the two sitting at the table plus one single.”   
Joe crossed out two silver coins from his inventory.

“Wait, no-- I meant I’ll share with Aar-- Jim!” Rami said, frantically. 

But the DM had already turned into themself again. Joe gave Rami an apologetic smile. 

“Maybe if we had put on a show and played a few songs, they’ll have let us stay here for free”, they overheard Ben say once they got back. 

Aaron looked up. “We have plenty of money, actually.” 

“What we do not have is some entertainment for tonight”, Lucy sighed. 

“We’ll buy a deck of cards tomorrow.”

The DM spoke. “A few people come over to your table, since not many new people show their faces in their village these days.” 

“Why?”   
“Maybe they’ll tell you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Weird place to end a chapter, I know ..   
> I promise the next chapters will be longer and more Queen oriented, I just wanted to try and get into the world first. I'm sort of new to the whole DnD thing myself..   
> Enjoy! :)

**Author's Note:**

> Not that long and very heavy on dialogue, but I wanted to upload a bit and hear people's opinions so far before I went further :)


End file.
